This month, Platinum columnist and Loose Women presenter Jane Moore comes to a logical conclusion about her personality.
My daughters sent me an online personality test* recently, along with the accompanying prediction that my outcome from the 16 options would be “logistician”.
I answered honestly – my logical brain tells me that, otherwise, there’s no point – and they were spot on. “Logisticians are practical and fact-minded individuals, whose reliability cannot be doubted”, the written conclusion informed me.
PERSONA BY NUMBERS
But just as my head was starting to swell, there were a few stats that were open to slightly less flattering interpretation. On the assertive-to-turbulent scale, I scored 90 per cent assertive. Now of course, this can be a good thing in certain circumstances, such as asking for a pay rise or refusing to tolerate someone’s bad behaviour. I have always been quite ballsy in both scenarios.
But could it also mean that I’m too quick to railroad someone less assertive into following my lead on something when they might step up to the challenge if given time to do so? Maybe. Food for thought.
On the judging-to-prospecting scale, I was 85 per cent judging, which sounds awful if you take it in the pejorative “judgy” way, but I think it means that I prefer to organise my life in advance while a “prospector” prefers to make decisions in the moment. So I’ll take that. I love to-do lists and the second that, say, a trip abroad is confirmed, I’ll book the flights and accommodation so I can file it under “sorted” in my head.
For observant/intuitive, I was 60 per cent observant, for thinking/feeling, 62 per cent thinking, and for introverted/extroverted, I was 64 per cent introverted. All of which rings true to me. Even though I appear on television, which suggests I’m extroverted, I’m a journalist and we usually facilitate others to tell their stories by taking a backseat ourselves. Also, I’m very happy in my own company, which, quite frankly,
I consider to be a superpower.
SPOILER ALERT!
But back to the logical brain. It makes me great on a team-building treasure hunt because I’m a handy ally when you need a complex situation unpicking. But it can make me a bit of a pedant in a discussion when I think there’s something illogical that I can’t let rest.
It also makes me a nightmare to watch an escapist movie with. When the protagonist always manages to get a parking space right outside the police station/apartment block/restaurant, I mutter under my breath, “well that wouldn’t happen in real life” and my daughters chorus, “Mum, shut up, we know!”.
And if it involves the profession of journalism, I loudly declare “pah” so frequently when something wholly implausible happens that they now only agree to watch it with me if I swear an oath of silence.
I’d love to sit down at home, suspend disbelief and just enjoy a thriller or horror for what it is, but I’m always looking for the hidden clues in every scene that might point to the killer or plot twist, and can’t help but point them out when they arise.
For example, when I watched The Sixth Sense, I clocked very early on that (spoiler alert!) Bruce Willis was a ghost. I knew that saying so would ruin the film for my friends, so I leaned in to just one of them and whispered it in her ear. Otherwise, how would anyone know that I was a logical genius, right? As I said,
I’m a nightmare.
You’ll be pleased to learn that I have now taught myself not to spoil films at the cinema. Instead, I collect all the obvious clues and illogical occurrences in my head, then unburden them on everyone during the car journey home.
However, in my own living room and those of others, I still struggle not to be a “logistician” smarty pants, which is why few of my friends ever want to watch a film with me.
But if they’re planning an escape-room outing for their birthday, I’m always top of their invite list
*If you would like to take the free online personality test, go to 16personalities.com.
Buy of the month
If you live alone and don’t fancy heating every room, get yourself a heated throw. Mine is the Lakeland StaySnug Faux Fur Heated Throw (£119.99, lakeland.co.uk), and I sit under it when watching TV. There are cheaper alternatives too, and for a fraction of what it costs to keep your heat on.
Look of the month
Here’s a little “glam” hack for you when you simply don’t have the time to dress up for an event. Team a classic, tailored trouser suit with these must-have Burlington Boots from Kurt Geiger (£199, kurtgeiger.com) for an effortless piece of “showbiz sparkle”. It works a treat for looking glam – I know I’ll wear mine forever.
Jane’s diary
I have known Sharon Osbourne for over 15 years so when she asked me to interview her on stage for a theatre tour, I jumped at the chance. She was fearlessly honest about her rollercoaster life and very funny too. The audiences loved it.
Look out for Jane’s regular column in each issue of Platinum!
Words: Jane Moore. Images: Jane Moore, Shutterstock, and Asda.com
